I'll Miss You, Marin: Rodeo Beach

I've got just about two months before I fly the coop and move to Europe for who knows how long. Marin has been such a good place to me and my family. We lived in a sweet little house under eucalyptus trees overlooking the bay with my parents right next door. Couldn't ask for more, really. So I thought now was as good a time as any to start the process of noting all of my favorite spots, for those inevitable days in Slovenia when the homesickness will hit, and I'll miss this beautiful place I've been able to call home for a little while. 

"Then you better start swimmin' or you'll sink like a stone, for the times they are a-changin'"

Rodeo Beach has been one of our favorite spots. Here are a few memories I hold dear from this beach:

It's a sweet, calming, beautiful place and I'll treasure all the time spent there. :)

A few moments of rain

We had a few short moments of rain this morning for the first time in quite a while. Followed by some comforting grey weather. The rain was fleeting, but restorative.

I've had trouble sleeping lately. My mind races into the very early hours of the morning until finally my body forces me to shut down for a few hours. I'm anxious about this next big step — our move to Europe.

Anxious and relieved and terrified and quite excited, all at the same time.

Anxious because there are still a bunch of unknowns and I'm having a difficult time picturing us there. Relieved because I have some work on myself to do, and I'm thankful for time to do it. Terrified because I have never been more than forty minutes away from my family, and I don't know how it will feel to be an outsider. And quite excited because I am a person who really loves change and contrast in my life. I am looking forward to new habits, new scenery, new thoughts, new memories, new me. 

All of these thoughts are tearing up my insides a little bit. And I'm torturing myself by indulging in them, rather than just moving them aside, temporarily, and focusing on one day at a time. Still, I've always operated under the principle that when things get difficult, it's a good idea to let myself feel those fears, anxieties, sadnesses — really feel them — then let them go at some point. I like the contrast of moving from dark to light and the sense of pride that comes with it.

But today my head is still quite dizzy with ideas and concerns.

The rain did help, though.