And Off She Goes!

When I was little I begged my parents for a little sister. Finally when I was 7 and a half years old, a soon-to-be-curly-haired-bundle-of-craziness joined our family in the form of a perfect baby. Kenza was the cutest baby I've ever seen. She had an attitude from the minute she came into the world and that hasn't let up one bit. I feel like I helped raise her. I changed her diapers, played with her, babysat, watched her grow, gave her advice and so much more. I actually eel like I'm a parent and a sister. I dropped Kenza off at the airport yesterday morning to move away to college and I felt (and still feel) a mix of emotions: proud, anxious, sad, and overwhelmingly excited for her. I can't believe that little wild baby is off to start one of the most amazing adventures of her life. I have to say, I'm thrilled that high school is over for her (high school sucks) and I can't wait to see what kind of a woman she becomes in college.

Kenza — 

I know I already wrote you a 4 page survival guide for college (not that I really handled those 4 years all that well, but hey, I learned a lot!) but here are just a couple more thoughts for you. 

• Learn how to use the library. I never did and I regret it every day.
• Take advantage of the energy around you. Feed off of it. You won't find energy like that again. 
• Do not put your pet fish in a bowl of water from the sink while you clean it's tank. Claire and I can give you more info on this if you need it. 
• Find a TV show you and your girlfriends like, and get together to watch it every week. This will be one of your fondest memories when you're 26. 
• Call your sister all the time. Send her pictures and emails and give her lots of details because she desperately misses college. 
• We love you! 

Have so much fun! Savor everything! Utah is so lucky to have you. Damir and I will visit all the time. ;) 

Love,  

Camilla

Top photo of my sister at her favorite place in the world taken with my iphone and edited with VSCO cam. Bottom two photos from Kenza's high school graduation.

Lavender Wreaths

Between our little house and garden and my parents larger and more impressive house and garden, we have quite the yearly lavender harvest. Every year my mother and I wonder what to do with all this glorious lavender that we need to harvest. We've made wands, syrups, sachets and bouquets, but I've wanted to make a gorgeous summery wreath for some time now. I love the idea of seasonal wreaths. Bay from our trees in the fall, maybe bare branches in the winter, and lavender in the warmer months. Finally we sat down at my coffee table and got to it. It was a lot easier than we thought it would be, and it turned out way better than we imagined it would. It's such a great way to celebrate and show off the harvest for the rest of the season. We've definitely created a new yearly tradition!

To make this wreath, we *sort of* followed this video tutorial. Really we just watched it for a minute then went with what felt right. I would like to note that this wreath used up a LOT of lavender. Basically we wired bunches of lavender to a wooden wreath base. So simple!

Getting out of the fast lane

It is important from time to time to slow down, to go away by yourself, and simply be.
— Eileen Caddy

I was watching the news this morning and drinking a cup of very strong coffee in my favorite Good Morning mug when I heard something that sent me into a panic of sorts. The reporter was talking about Apple potentially unveiling a lighter, thinner, faster product that would make the old product seem ridiculous and ancient. Suddenly it hit me: lighter, thinner, faster is pretty much the exact opposite of what I'm going for right now as far as my life goes. 

Let me explain a little bit. I'm a person who can quickly enter into an existentialist crisis if I think of the wrong thing at the wrong time. It's scary and empty when I get that way and it usually hits when things are moving too fast and I feel like I'm not experiencing things fully. So late last year I got rid of twitter because it was one of those empty habits that removed me from being present for no good reason at all. It was a huge release for me. I still have a bad Instagram habit, though that is starting to frustrate me lately. I realized the other day that I never take my camera out anymore. And if I do, I almost resent how much of a task it is. Instagram (and my iphone in general) completely removes me from the moment and I've started working to shift how I use it and how much I use it. Not every moment needs to be shared, I'm learning. Not every picture-perfect instagram snap is actually a great moment and not every great moment makes for a picture-perfect instagram snap.

I appreciate social media and technology and how we all can be so connected to one another and to information. But at the same time I totally hate the feeling of being that connected all the time. Maybe it's the fact that I'm feeling nostalgic and watching Felicity for the 100th time (give me a break, my husband is gone for 3 months and my baby sister is leaving for college in a week) but I really miss the quiet moments. I'm not talking about moments without actual noise - I'm talking about moments without virtual noise, information, emails, tweets, snapchats (what the hell is this snapchat thing?) facebook messages, LCD screens, and so on. Goodness, sometimes it all just makes me insane.

For the past 2 weeks I've been reminding anyone who will listen to me (sorry family) about the days when we used to log onto mapquest for directions and either print them out or write them down. And what was before that? Maps? I keep thinking of how excited I was to get my own phone in my room — not even my own line but my own phone — and how my dad had to restrict my time on AIM chatting with my friends (my screen name was cinnaminna16). I miss the days of carrying around disposable cameras and waiting to get my pictures developed. Now I take everything for granted. I don't even have a map in my car in case my phone dies or fails. I haven't heard my husbands voice in over a week because text messaging is so much more convenient than setting aside time for an actual phone call. Emails are snail mail and snail mail is like using a courier pigeon.  Do people even have house phones these days? Music and movies are instant and I don't even know if blockbuster exists anymore. Who needs to send someone a birthday card when you can write on their wall?

The other day my sister was waiting for her iphone to be fixed and she was given a simple AT&T non-smartphone for a few hours (as if she couldn't go even 2 hours without a phone on her person at all times). Anyways, we sat at lunch giggling about how refreshing and strange it was not to be able to look up information right away. She said she had a video to show me and reached for her phone to pull it up and was shocked when she couldn't. I said, "if it's that important, you'll remember to show me later". She didn't. 

I'm getting way off topic, and maybe I don't even know what the topic is anymore, but all I know is I don't like this thinner, faster, more efficient mantra we keep being force fed. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a lot of what technology has given us. Blogging for example has been a godsend to me. Skype is essential and I'd be really sad being alone all the time if it weren't for Netflix. And I mean three words: Game Of Thrones. Thank God for HBO. But I do think that maybe we're taking it a bit overboard. I don't think we need to go back to the stone age or even to the 90's (let's face it - beepers were stupid), but I do think maybe we should consider adopting a new mantra some of the time: slower, more substantial, more enjoyable. 

So I guess my point in all of this — not that I need to have a point, I'm just sharing what's been on my mind lately — is that I've found myself slowing down a little bit more than usual lately. I've come up with a few things that make my life a little bit sweeter and slower. In turn, I haven't felt so desperate that time is going by too quickly and my existentialist crises are at bay for now. I'm happier. I'm convinced that the direction the world is moving in is not the direction that I want to move in. And I'm lucky to have a husband that agrees with me on this issue. That being said, here are a few ways I want to (and have been) slow down a bit:

• I spend at least 10 minutes a day just walking around my garden and looking at the plants without my phone or camera. If I want a picture, I have to come back and take it. It's kind of incredible how therapeutic it is to disconnect even for 10 minutes.
• Damir and I have been on the hunt for actual alarm clocks (not cell phones) that we like for some time. We want to remove our cell phones from our bedroom entirely.  If ever there was a place to not be checking twitter or instagram or emails, it's in the bedroom.
• I've been doing more things in the kitchen lately. I don't make big deals over it and I find myself really enjoying my time more in there. 
• I am [trying to] actively restrict myself from sharing everything on instagram. Some moments just need to be MY moments. And I just want to put a little more thought into the things I share.  But please note that I am still WORKING on this.
• I actually grabbed a few disposable cameras at Walgreens a few months ago and I can't wait to see what the pictures are! 
• Board games: come on! There's nothing like them. Also cards - I need to play more cards.  Some of my fondest memories are of Damir and I in Croatia, sitting on a balcony with no internet access, drinking bottles of wine and playing a Bosnian card game together for 6 hours.
• I'm gonna buy a map for my car ASAP.
• I don't care about fashion trends at all anymore. I wear what makes me happy and what makes me feel like myself. Trends come and go and Felicity has recently taught me that what we think looks good right now will look crazy 15 years from now.  I'm not sure why but this has helped me find a lot more peace.
• Everybody needs to make out more. Everything is so rushed but making out (and beyond) absolutely shouldn't be. There are some things in life that just need to be prioritized.

Okay so now I'm curious. How do you feel about the current state of technology and social media? Do you have any ways you like to remove yourself from the fast lane? 

[Photos all ironically taken with my iphone at Rodeo Beach. I so had to resist sharing them on Instagram right away but I'm happy I did.] 

Chicks — An Update!

The chiquita bananas are now 3-4 weeks old! The older bunch (Francesca, Edith, Colette, and Kiki) are almost fully feathered and the younger two (Stevie and Kate) are steadily growing and learning. It's been so fun to watch them grow. They're getting so big — it's crazy how fast that happens. The girls are really great at posing for pictures for me so here are entirely too many.

A few notes about the chicks at this stage:

• Edith is getting some red feathers on her chest and I am so excited! She's not too keen on being picked up though all of a sudden, so we're working on it. She tries really hard to fly out of the brooder, but doesn't have it down like the other birds yet.
• Stevie is kind of amazing. She's growing super fast and has already learned how to fly out of the brooder. She does this funny thing where she runs right up to other birds and gets really close and stares at them.
• Kate is the smallest and the least developed. She is completely uninterested in leaving the warm brooder. She's got everything she needs in there and she knows it. She's such a sweet bird.
• Francesca is totally the head chick right now. And she's jealous! If you pick up another bird and not her, she will run right up to that bird afterwards and pounce on them. She demands attention - and she gets it. Such a lovable bird. She really likes being carried and running around the apartment trying to fly. It's hilarious. 
• The cuckoo's, Kiki and Colette, are still skittish and hate being picked up. They've gotten better at tolerating it. They LOVE sitting on top of the brooder and being above everyone else. They're probably the smartest of the bunch. They learn how to do things first and everyone else just copies them.
• Currently the chicks get a rotation of small mealworms (so fun to watch them grab these and run all over the brooder)  and plain yogurt (which is creates a MESS). I'll start giving them some greens and fruit soon!
• They'll be getting some outside time late next week if the weather is warm enough and then in a couple of weeks, we'll be able to move them out to their coop, I hope!
• My house is a disaster from all the dust they kick up and it will be a really nice feeling to sleep through the night without chick noises waking me up. But truth be told, I'll miss them. I anticipate I'll want to spend a lot of time with them in their pen. But hey, it's the perfect place to study! 

See how much they have grown by going back to the last chick post! 

The Best of Northern California — Matt Davis to Dipsea to Steep Ravine

I've had an itch to go on an adventure recently and since I haven't been able to hike in a while, I made a plan to try out a trail and convinced my sister to join me. We packed some sandwiches and snacks, lots of water, and headed up Mt. Tam. We parked at the Pan Toll ranger station and asked one of the attendants what trail she recommended. She gave us two options — a shorter loop (about 3 miles) or a long loop all the way down to Stinson beach and back up the gorgeous Steep Ravine trail (just under 7 miles). Since we didn't swim that morning and I like to suffer, we chose the longer trail and headed on our way. The first half of our hike was downhill on the Matt Davis trail, headed down to the beach. By the time we got to the beach to eat lunch, our legs were shaking. I prefer uphill over downhill any day!! Still, the views were magnificent and it felt so good to get to the beach for a well-deserved rest. Once we got down to the beach we watched all the people enjoying the hot weather, got sand kicked on us by a lady who clearly has not had much experience walking on a beach (she passed us by from like 2 feet away and just covered us in sand - no apology or anything), and caught our breath a little bit. Then we took off for the way back home, not really aware of just how far we had to go. We hopped on the famous Dipsea trail enjoying the lush shady areas and charging through the hot chaparral landscape. At one point we turned around and could see the spot we came from on the beach. We couldn't believe how far we had walked! From the Dipsea trail we switched to Steep Ravine which I had read boasted stunning trees, waterfalls, and even a ladder to climb. Steep Ravine did not disappoint. Kenza and I agreed that it was one of the most beautiful trails we'd ever been on. It was fairly steep though, and our legs were already shot. Still, we kept going and finally made it back to Pan Toll. The whole hike from start to finish took us 4 hours. We were exhausted, proud, and fulfilled. We came home immediately and made s'mores... naturally.

Here are some snaps as we hiked along! I love how many different types of land and foliage we were able to experience — dry grasses, redwoods, the beach, chaparral, lush greenery, and even waterfalls. So incredible! 

The more I hike and explore this beautiful county we live in, the more I believe that we are designed to do this — to go on adventures and experience the world around us. It's the best therapy in the world.

If you've got a day and you want to get in a very solid workout as well as see a lot of natural, northern californian beauty, I highly recommend this loop. Prepare your legs and bring more water than you think you need, especially if it's warm out.